As many of you already know I did the big chop (BC) at the beginning of this year. I get asked a lot why on earth would I do something seemingly so drastic. No one really believed me that I was actually serious "this time." To answer your question, my short answer is duh, it was the obvious next step. The long answer is....
True to form, I became bored and colored it, cut it, then cut it some more. Throughout my HHJ I had very little tolerance for the "natural hair nazis" as they were called the blogs (we'll discuss that later). However, as I matured, I started toying with the idea of "going natural" for simply no other reason than I was bored or so I thought. Regardless, the actual thought frightened me. I was very afraid, I had so many what ifs, and many detractors that the actual step took me quite a while. Admittedly it took me three tries but one day I did it....
How it all began
As an international student living on my own in Oklahoma, finding a black hairdresser who could "do hair good" AND was affordable was next to impossible. As a college student hair maintenance was a lifestyle I simply could not afford but still desired. I found myself making many trips to the local beauty supply stores buying relaxers in a box and "how to", "hair care", "black hair" were keywords that I googled all too often.
Eventually, I came across multiple hair forums and became gradually interested in this healthy hair journey fad. It was a new world! I was completely intrigued and became completely invested in my hair journey. I went through the phases, became a product junkie, obsessed over labels, banned silicones and mineral oils, deep conditioned weekly, trimmed quarterly, joined youtube and experimented even more. My hair grew and thickened and I loved every minute of it.
AND NOW I HAVE REGRETS
I regret that I questioned myself. I regret that I listened to people, I regret that I waited so long!
I AM OBSESSED!
I'm obsessed with my hair, i'm obsessed with my curls, i'm obsessed with my afrocentric look. I get asked if I texturized my hair a lot and I proudly answer no. I have taken the same principles I learned with relaxed hair on my natural hair journey and I look forward to this new phase.
The day I decided to big chop and actually went through with it was such a moment of empowerment that I struggle to describe. You have to experience it to truly understand. I finally did the big chop and I regret not doing it sooner!
So why did I do it?
It's all apart of my journey. I did it partly because I wanted to prove the naysayers wrong, I did it because I loved the look, I did it because IT FELT RIGHT. I choose not to be philosophical about it but I can say this experience is truly grounding. Will I ever relax again? Never say never, but at this moment I have no desire to do so.
